Thursday, January 13, 2011

The Change We Can All Believe In

I'm going to suggest that there are three kinds of people (I seem to like the number three lately), based on how happy they are.

The first group is miserable. On a scale of 1 to 10, they might be at a 2 or less. I call this group the "Something Has to Change" group. They are miserable and see that they are miserable.

The second group is what I call the "Good Days, Bad Days" group. This group has a big range, maybe from a 3 to an 8. Life is pretty good some of the time for these folks. More for the 8s than the 3s, certainly. But for the most part, life is tolerable and works some percentage of the time. They get some of the things they want and meet some of their goals. Just enough to think that they know how life works and that the know how to be happy. I'd guess the vast majority of people are in this group. Including a lot of people who we might think are in the first group, except for the fact that they haven't bottomed out yet. You might think of a few Hollywood stars who have been in and out of rehab, for example. They still believe their way of living can work, if they only fine tune it a bit.

The third group is the "Life is Great!" group. For these folks, life has a wondrous, blissful sense about it. It is truly an adventure in creation and almost every moment is savored.

Which group do you think is most likely to change?

I dare say it's the "Life is Great!" group.

Why? Because this group sees that life is an ever-changing adventure. While you'd think they have no need to change, it also turns out they have no resistance to change. They are best able to flow with the changes of life because they see that life itself is change.

The "Something Has to Change" group is actually the second most likely group to change. Because they've bottomed out and see they need help. But change is still difficult for this group. They have seen the error of their old ways, but have not replaced those ways with more successful strategies.

The "Good Days, Bad Days" group finds it very hard to change. Almost impossible, in fact. Because their thinking doesn't permit it. They see change as something to be resisted rather than embraced. They put a lot of their efforts into holding onto the good things in their lives, because they are scared to death of losing them. And because of this, any change, any risk at all is terrifying.

The good news is that you don't have to be in the "Life is Great!" group 24/7 to effect great change. Let's face it, no one, not even the most enlightened sage, is in that space all the time.

But if you can just see the possibilities in this moment, and embrace them, that can be more than enough.


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