Thursday, May 20, 2010

Give Your Self a Break

I am a coach in Peter Fenner's Radiant Mind course, which means that I get to spend one-on-one time with students as they try to figure the course out. Many of the students have been very successful in school, in their profession, and in following the practices of other traditions. They are often expert in figuring out what to do and where to go.

Peter has designed the Radiant Mind course, though, so that there is nothing to figure out. In fact, that is the point of many of the exercises. Participants discover that there is nowhere you need to go, and nothing you need to do, to be in this thing (that is not a thing!) called unconditioned awareness. "If you think you have it figured out," Peter will say, "that's not it." The course is a paradox. It is billed as "experiential," while at the same time Peter insists that unconditioned awareness is not an experience.

There tends to be a lot of confusion. We don't like to be confused, so we tell ourselves stories about what things mean, or about what is going to happen, so that we can be more comfortable. But it can be helpful, whether you are in a Radiant Mind course or not, to explore what it feels like not to know. 

Our minds are always working. We are always trying to get somewhere (whether that is a physical somewhere or not), and when we don't know where we are trying to go it can be very frustrating. But maybe, just for a minute, or five minutes, we can sit with not knowing. With just being.


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